Live what you believe

Happy New Year, Friends!
I'm sure that many of you would join me in saying it has been a tough year!  Many of us will be glad to see the new year come in, hoping it will carry with it a change for the better, a trend towards a better economy, good health, creative new endeavors.  Maybe even an overhaul of health care!

Have you made that list of resolutions in the past?  I used to start every year with a list of things I would like to manifest in the coming year.  I would write it in the front of my new calendar each year, and I would try to read over it once a week.  I was often amazed at the end of that year that even if I'd forgotten to "work" on those things, some of them came to be, simply by my putting them in my line of view.  The mind is amazing that way.

Then I had another period in my life (we all have them, don't we?) where everything that could go wrong did.  No amount of manifesting or positive thinking seemed to bring about a change to the pattern.  Was I doing something wrong?  Was this bad karma?  It was a major upset to my belief system that nothing I could seem to do had a visible effect on the events surrounding me.  I felt periods of doom and gloom.  When that new year rolled around, I simply didn't have the energy to muster up a list of resolutions or manifestations.  Since my monumental efforts had produced no change, I felt a bit...well...hopeless.

As a result, on that New Year's Eve, I found myself ponderous.  I had no desire to participate in a First Night, watch fireworks or the ball dropping, or even commune with friends.  I was at home, quiet, not even realizing I had fallen into worship. (Worship can be that kind of thing...the Light can sneak up on you when you're not even paying attention and draw you inward, have you noticed?)  In my inner sanctum a voice began to call, quietly repeating it self:  "Live what you believe."

What?  "Live what you believe."  It was almost too simple.  Yet with it came a peace and a strength, a feeling of something dawning. 

"Live what you believe."  This would become my mantra.  In times of darkness, it would come back to me.  In times of light, it would celebrate with me.

"Live what you believe."  Simple yes, but easy, not quite.  This was over 20 years ago.  I am still aiming at this simple goal in my life.  It's simple, powerful call has awakened Spirit in me, and called me to look at every aspect of my life.

DO I live what I believe?  Sometimes.  More now than before.  As the Light has called me to reveal my beliefs to myself and others, it has called me to be more genuine.  It has also called me to look deeper, to reveal what lies in the shadows.  I often had glimpses of those shadows in the past, and I ran from them.  Now I know that God is calling me to love and nurture myself to the place where I can live what I believe, and that means illuminating those shadows.

Do you live what you believe?  I know that I could not have moved to live so directly in the Light were it not for my spiritual community here at Hopewell Centre.  When my light is weak, you hold the beacon.  When I am weak you carry me, and hopefully you allow me to do the same for you.  God's Light calls us into community with each other, so that we can lead each other in the dark times, and celebrate with each other in the Light.  You ask me the difficult questions.  Send me a meal for nourishment.  Offer words of encouragement.  Through you, God calls to the rest of the community.  You are an integral part of this puzzle of community that nurtures us all.